Archive for the 'Men' Category
September 28 2008: Single Penis Girl
Filed under Friends & Men with 13 Comments
Many of my acquaintances don’t know I’m in a relationship, for the sheer fact that it’s never come up in conversation, and I’m not the type of person to just start gushing “Oh my god, I’m like, in a relationship, lulz”.
For those who know, most reactions have been along the lines of “What, you? In a relationship? Really? What have you been smoking? Does he have a thirteen inch cock?”. In short, total and utter disbelief that someone who has enjoyed as many casual liaisons as myself would ever restrict herself to a single penis. And, uh, the guy attached to the penis. Because I’m not shallow at all.
I think that people in my life prefer me as a footloose and fancy free single gal. The ironic thing of course, is that my life really hasn’t changed at all. Logistically, I can only see the fella once a week, so it’s not like my time is being entirely consumed by him. As previously mentioned, I’m not the type to refer to him all the time. In fact, the only thing that’s changed is the fact that I’m only enjoying a single penis, rather than multiple penii.
Yet, people are beginning take a “omgz she’s half of a couple” approach with me, treating me as though I have no idea what it’s like to be flirty and on the receiving end of male attention. In short, entirely forgetting the Amanda I am, the Amanda I’ve always been. Dammit, I’m not defined by the fact that I’m a single penis girl!
September 20 2008: The Father Of An Obsession
Filed under Media & Men with 7 Comments
I don’t want to come across as a crazy stalker who remembers the smallest details about the objects of her obsessions - BUT - I saw a job advertisement in today’s The Age newspaper that immediately set off alarm bells in my crazy stalker brain. The Peninsula School is advertising for a new school principal to begin in the 2010 school year, as the current principal, a certain Mr. Ray Hille, has announced his retirement at the end of 2009.
Under normal circumstances, I would skip this sort of advertisement - though I make it a habit to go through the weekly job postings, I’m hardly qualified to be a school principal. However, when Mr. Ray Hille is the father of one of my former obsessive crushes, footballer David Hille, this sort of thing draws my interest. It isn’t even as though it’s widely known that David Hille’s father is a school principal - rather, it was mentioned in a mere half-sentence in a short profile I read well over six years ago. Yet, simply reading a job advertisement with his father’s name was enough to trigger a steady flow of amorous thoughts and fantasies of David Hille himself.
Either I have a photographic memory, or I’m just obsessive. (BTW, David? If you read this? Call me.)
September 10 2008: Image Representations Of People In My Life
Filed under Family & Men & Online with 15 Comments
By virtue of the fact that I completed my essay early yesterday, and had a couple of hours to kill, I decided to mangle more faces, in particular those of people who I mention with regularity on this blog.
|
My brother. He has monkey ears, typically Asian slit eyes and a pug nose. |
 |
My father. He’s a jowly fellow, with a perpetual five o’clock shadow and squinty eyes. |
 |
My mother. Short hair, glasses, and just the hint of crows feet at the corners of her eyes. |
 |
The fella. Gorgeous blue eyes, clothed entirely in black, and pixie-esque pricked ears. |
I obviously have too much time on my hands. Time to stop procrastinating and perhaps actually get a head start on assignments not due for another two weeks. Or, to continue applying for jobs like I’m currently reluctantly doing. One or the other.